Welcome to my Blog

I Will Honor My Husband blog site began as a wife's journey to love, honor and cherish her husband everyday for one full year in 2011. The experience was so awesome that I am continuing the journey. As the Lord guides me I will continue to post about how I am honoring my husband on at least a weekly basis. This blog is for me and other wives to learn how to be more intentional in demonstrating our love, honor and respect for our husbands in a way that matters to them most. Last year it was a challenge and a goal to make it a habit, this year I hope to realize the habit as a way of life. I welcome, encourage and invite you to - Join the Movement! and let the world know you honor your husband.

My prayer is that marriages and lives will be changed across the globe by the expression of "One Year of Love". Please send me a picture of you and your husband so the world will know you have joined the movement.

Rochelle

"The Lord, your God is testing you to find out whether you love him with all your heart and all your soul." Deut. 13:3

Tuesday, August 9, 2011

Day 174 Honoring My Husband As The Provider

Today I had a very interesting aha! moment.  As I asked the Lord to lead me to how I needed to honor my husband he led  me back to the 7 Revelations from "For Women Only" by Shaunti Feldhahn.  The third revelation is "Men are providers" - Even if you personally make enough income to support the family's lifestyle, it would make no difference to the mental burden he feels to provide.  What I found interesting as I delved into this revelation was just how deep this runs for our husbands.  When asking the 4,000 men interviewed the question, "Suppose your wife/significant other earned enough to support your family lifestyle.  Would you still feel a compulsion to provide for your family?"  76% of the men responded yes and the author notes that the compulsion is greater in minority men. 

A few of the other findings that struck me were, men feel powerful when they provide. And they want to be depended on.  Being a provider is a highly desirable goal.  Providing is a primary way to say "I love you" and long hours equal love to men.  This was a nice revelation to have.  Bryan works all the time and we have often had conversations about whether his priority is his business or his family.  His response has always been exactly what the author found, "I work so hard because I want to make sure you are taken care of."  I am almost embarrassed to admit I did not always believe him.  I really thought he just loved his work.  The author also found that working long hours is a way a man experience success.

As I reflected upon the findings about the husband's need to provide, I began to feel an even greater appreciation for Bryan and how he has handled me quitting my job.  I quit my job last year to pursue my passion and although my husband is very supportive of me and my abilities he was not too crazy about my chosen area of focus.  I left my job at the height of the economic crisis and at a time when his business was not doing as well as it had in the past.  However over the past 16 months since leaving my job he has never said to me you should not have left nor has he pushed for me to find other employment.  We have had our challenges but I can honestly say my husband fits the bill when it comes to his role as the provider.  I am so proud of him because of this.  Today I am honoring my husband as the provider that he is and continues to strives to be. 

I had been talking about leaving my job for at least a year and a half before I left and it was amazing to me how he became very strategic about how we were going to fill the gap to replace my salary.  I feel truly blessed and honored to have him as my husband.  I realize his quest to be the provider comes with a lot of stress and when I left my job I added to that burden.  As the author noted, men often think about what is the worse that can happen.  This is the world my husband lives in; he is always trying to be financially proactive instead of reactive.  Men feel like failures if their family encounter financial problems, even if they are out of their control, this explains that behavior.

Wives of the world in what ways can you honor your husband as the provider?  Even if you make more money than him; know that it is a fundamental need for him to feel like the provider in the home.  How can you honor your husband for all that he does to try to provide for you as his wife and your family?  The author found that being a provider is the key arena where men experience the ongoing risk of failure.  In what ways can you uplift your husband as the provider so he feels appreciated in this vain.  Please share your stories with us; we would love to hear from you.

Blessings,

Rochelle

"One of the ways the Lord ensures our needs are provided is by giving us a husband."

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