Day 227 Honoring My Husband's Fatigue

Sometimes we just need a break
from the hustle and bustle of the road.

One of the things I love about Sunday's is that if I am not in school or scheduled to serve at church,   Bryan and I get to spend the day riding to and from church together.  On those days he will typically do the driving.  I call it my special day because I get to be chauffeured by him all day long.  One of the things I love about him is that he still opens and closes the door for me most of the time, but especially on Sunday's.  Today was one of those special days and he topped it off with a nice early dinner so I did not have to worry about cooking when we got home.  However at the end of our meal he stated he was very tired and asked if I would drive home.  Of course I said yes however I was a little disappointed that my special day was coming to an end earlier than I had anticipated.  Today I honored my husband's fatigue by taking the wheel on one of my special days.

I would be remiss if I did not share the history of how Sunday's became my special day.  Bryan drives 60 miles to and from his business location Monday through Saturday since we moved into our current home.  Prior to moving to our current hometown he always drove us to church on Sunday's or whenever we would go somewhere of distance on the weekends.  After about a year of us moving, I noticed that he had begun to ask me to drive much more frequently than I cared to on Sunday's.  It became somewhat of a contentious issue in our marriage because I became increasingly disappointed about not having my special day.  After several months of having creative dialogue on Sunday mornings about who was going to drive, it finally dawned on me that I was not aware of why he was reluctant to drive on the weekend as he had before.  When I asked him about it I learned that because he drove at least 120 miles round trip six days of the week, he was quite tired of driving by the time Sunday came around.  By the way our church is also 120 miles round trip. 

By asking the right questions it opened the door for both of us to understand each other's perspective.  He had no idea how special Sunday's were for me and I did not realize just how exhausting driving could get for him.  Based on that conversation we both agreed to meet each other's needs in that area as much as possible.  He still does most of the driving on Sunday's however I know at any time he could feel tired and I will have to take over the wheel and end my special day.  Sometimes we will compromise before we leave the house and I will drive to church and he will drive home and take us to handle any errands we need to accomplish.  Isn't it amazing how a little communication can change one's world?  Today I honored my husband's fatigue by keeping my commitment and taking over the wheel so he could rest his mind before having to make the drive early the next day.  I was sad and honored at the same time.

Wives of the world how do you or can you honor your husband's fatigue?  Are there times when he would like you to take over something that he normally does but he has run out of energy? How do you handle those situations?  Do you take over with pride or does it become a source of contention, resentment and frustration for you?  How can you negotiate getting both your needs met in that arena?  Please share your stories with us; we would love to hear from you.

Blessings,

Rochelle

"The strongest have their moments of fatigue." Friedrich Nietzsche